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Desi Satire

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February 2008
Desi Satire

There are reports that cricket umpire Steve Bucknor was run over by a road-roller. Police say that Bucknor was on his daily morning walk when a road-roller coming at 5 mph hit him from the front. It appears that Bucknor, due to his poor eyesight and hearing, did not see the vehicle approaching. Reliable ICC and Australian cricket board sources have said that Bucknor’s body will be mummified and preserved on a stand and be used for officiating all subsequent matches involving Australia. When asked how he would actually manage to signal his decisions, it was said that Ricky Ponting has kindly agreed to do it for him, as Ponting has had enough practice doing so in the Sydney test.

(Submitted by Sanjay Saggere.)

QUOTA OF QUOTES

“India’s national commitment is against racism. Our national struggle is based on values which negate racism.” – India cricket board president Sharad Pawar, in a statement protesting the three-match ban on bowler Harbhajan Singh for allegedly calling Australian Andrew Symonds a “monkey.” (PTI)

“Hanuman is the original superhero. He is thousands of years older than Superman, Spider-Man and Batman. He is a brand to reckon with among Indian children today.” -- Nadish Bhatia, general manager of marketing at Percept Picture Co., which co-produced the animated movie “The Return of Hanuman.” (Washington Post)

“Even if it cost $1 million, the joy that they had delivered to me is so much more than any money that I have given them. They’re godsends to deliver something so special.” – Ritu Sodhi of Los Angeles, who returned from India with a baby boy, having spent $20,000 on a surrogate mother at a Gujarat clinic that specializes in outsourced pregnancies. (AP)

“My son’s level is higher than those of other Japanese children the same age. Indian education is really amazing! This wouldn’t have been possible at a Japanese kindergarten.” -- Eiko Kikutake, whose son Hayato, 5, attends one of several Indian schools in Japan catering to a growing number of parents who believe an Indian education is superior. (New York Times)

“Within 10-12 years, you can expect an Indian American to be in the US presidential race. I won’t be surprised when it happens.” -- Jay Goyal, member of the Ohio House of Representatives. (IANS)


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